The Path Ahead
Beginning therapy can be over whelming! You may be feeling anxious, unsure, hopeless, lost, angry, and desperate...or maybe hopeful, excited, motivated, and curious! Here's what you can expect:
First Sessions
I first meet with you to learn the story of your relationship and your hopes for therapy. Next, we meet 1:1 to dive deeper into your individual stories before coming back together and digging into the heart of the matter.
On going sessions
Each session is designed to help you and your partner begin to experience one another in a different way. We begin by understanding the patterns that have taken hold in the relationship which prevent you both from reaching one another in safe, secure connection. As we begin to understand and slow down this negative cycle, you will begin to rebuild your bond.
How does this end?
As you work through the stages of treatment, you will find that your communication has improved, your sense of trust and safety with one another has increased and you will know that your relationship is in a new place, a place where you and your partner are there for each other.
At it's most simple, this process will give you clarity, about yourself and your partner. Sometimes clarity allows us to make difficult decisions. There is no clear answer to the end of our work together, but my hope is to help you and your partner find that, together.
What is EFCT and why is it right for us?
Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT) is a unique approach to work with couples, designed to help people connect with their emotional experience and in turn, connect with their partner. Emotions are the driving force of our experiences in the world, and particularly in relationships. EFCT focuses on how we use these emotions to create maintain closeness, or to create distance. Then we use that to shape experiences where these emotions promote safety and connection.
Relational distress arises when partners do not share or respond to each other, leaving attachment needs unmet and causing distance that leads to conflict. When we don't feel connected to our partner, like they aren't there with us, relational distress is inevitable and painful.
The good news is that there is a way to change the patterns from insecure to secure. From distant to close. From "are you there? "to "ahh you're here". EFCT gives us a clear map towards this profound and long lasting change that radiates out of the relationship and positive impacts everyone around it.
EFT combines the science of bonding and emotion, and is considered the APA gold standard of couples therapy as an evidenced based practice, having gone through rigorous research on not just the outcome but the process of therapy. Therapy is then guided by a clear session-by-session map to help you move your relationship from distress, to stability.
